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| Another year is coming to an end, one more year of hell to endure woot woot!!
Much has happened this year, not enough time nor energy to list any of the major events. However, 2008 is not shaping up to be "best year ever".
There's definitely been up and downs but overall life is still happy-sunshine-rainbows-and-candies. Thinking about the future is truly scary because it's almost time to grow up! Don't really want to pursue anything (careers, brrrrrr) that isn't interesting but what can you do when it's time to ween yourself off of complete dependency?
To be specific, what can I possibly do with a Bachelors that will earn me a decent start-up living after graduation? Do university graduates ACTUALLY earn more than non-degree holders? It is a myth we are about to embrace in a year's time or so... In my opinion, an individual must possess the will and determination to make it in this hard-knocks life to actually achieve something meaningful; in my case, it's merely getting off my ass to make it happen but it is SOOOOOO HARD TO DO!!
I thought about my future and I see a few options:
#1: Apply for graduate studies
#2: Take a chance and pursue art studies, something no one in my family had the guts to pursue because "there's no money in it". Half true!
#3: Schmooze and booze my way through society, make connections, charm my way into something that will lead to a satisfying career.
#4: Move abroad, become an ex-pat, see what is available outside of the Arctic circle.
#5: Beg mother for financial support to start up a house-flipping project.
And of course, these options all have pros and cons:
#1: Requires another gazillion years in school. Another excuse to delay the growing-up process. Further supporting the "myth" that education=higher income. The question here is: Am I up for another few years in school?
#2: It will definitely be something meaningful, but how do you translate it into something that is profitable? Requires more brainstorming and schemes.
#3: Least likely to happen because I'm SOOOOOOOO POPULAR... right. But I can definitely do it, just how much soul-sucking is needed to accomplish this? A lot... it'll take a lot of work.
#4: I love traveling and I don't mind change, it is likely to happen but I don't have adequate knowledge of the opportunities that are available to me. Definitely not feeling the english-teaching career so lots of research is going to be needed to make this possibility come true.
#5: This can somewhat be linked to option #2 because the two can be connected. It'll be hard physical work but it will be the most rewarding job emotionally and financially if I am able to make it successful.
As you can see, EVERYTHING revolves around money and if anyone knows me, I like to be completely independent when it comes to financial support because that's just the way I am. This school year has been the first year that I haven't worked since I was 15 and damn it was hard! Living on a budget sucks! I do not wish to rely on my mother for money in the future, but that means I have to somehow make enough to start my dreams and right now the future feels far away but I just know with an blink of an eye I will be out of school.
To me, the conclusion looks like this: To be successful, you must always work twice as hard. You can't be lazy and you cannot habour wishful thinkings. Success really depends on your individual capabilities and you're a nobody until you prove to the world that you're a somebody. This links all of us together because it is a common trait we all share as humans; no matter if you were born with a silver spoon or nothing at all, if you don't work hard in life, you don't have anything. But my question is where do I begin and how do I start? For now my focus is to finish university, whatever happens happens, take it in stride and keep my head up.
The road looks scary and bumpy.
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| Haaarrooooooooooooooo! Seriously long time no edit. You think I should just quit Xanga altogether but ya know what? I like it - it's honestly a nice place to reflect upon life without nosyassmuthafuckas (Facebookians) digging through your thoughts like a crazyass stalker. So how goes everyone? Hope all is well... Another semester is coming to an end and am almost half way finished with university. Cannot believe how fast time is flying by! It feels as if yesterday was NYE (that being the last time I updated this thing, hehe). Many events have taken place during my brief Xanga absence... that guy I sucked face with at Niagra? Yea, we're permanently sucking face now and surprisingly he is very good at it  . Feels good to have a man around, I missed this feeling even though independence was pretty kickass while it lasted. Guess any wild child will have to settle down sooner or later, might as well try again and not fuck anything up this time. One more month of living here with Ah-my and Hill-billy and this hobo's gotta pack up and move into the new place by next month. I still can't grasp the idea of living on my own; I'm feeling both scared and happy for what's coming up. This I guess is what true independence feels like... no more bitching from mothers/room mates/house mates... no more SHARING!!... just kicking up my heels in my own pad. Sounds promising but I just know it's gonna be hella lonely, so now my mission is to find myself a companion. No I am not moving in the new boy-toy, I need a smaller dog than that... so if anyone's got a hookup for preferably a free canine give me a shout. Much appreciated. On another note; have applied for summer-abroad thingermajig so I am going to Hong Kong for four weeks learning alongside with my favourite UofT prof Dr. Falkentitties. Hopefully kick some butt in that course and boost up my dismal CGPA. School is seriously stressing me out, low marks, low esteem, low everything. If it continues to be this way I wonder if it's even worth staying in school when my sorry-ass achievements are so down in the dumps. I swear I say this all the time, but I'll say it again: First year commerce royally fucked me up the butt x 4. I've always wondered what would have happened had I not followed such blind ambitions... perhaps I wouldn't be in the sticky situation that I am in now. Le sigh, but what's been done has been done. Can't change the past or bend the space time continuum, damn where's Hiro when you need him? That show is damn good! Okay donkay, getting off tangent here... must get back to my last essay of the term... essays, love 'em or hate 'em... they're infinitely better than tests and math. For now, I'll BRB in another three months. Hopefully the only thing I have to report on is the arrival of my new pet...? As always, toke 'til you choke. 
And here's a picture of Toast just for kicks. | | |
| Happy 2007 everyone!!! Yes, yes... can you believe we're already five days into the year 2007??... even though it felt like nothing. I guess having no snow in T.O during x-mas holidays just doesn't feel right, damn you global warming!! But I probably still prefer this weather to 6ft. of snow anyday. Yes, I also haven't updated here in a while but that's because I didn't see anyone else juggling SIX fucking courses last semester. I swear I don't even know how I pulled that off... and to think I was almost gonna take SIX FUCKING courses this whole entire year. Thank gooooodness I didn't, or else I will for sure jump off of Woodsworth residence's roof. (Being the tallest building that I can think of on campus) Now that I can put this horrific semester behind, I am looking forward to having my fridays off again :) and only four courses to deal with :D. Life is gonna be sweeeeeeeet this winter. As for my holidays, here's a brief summary of my third visit back home on the shore since school started (I'm such a good daughter): We got cable! (again) I know, I know, like wtf... everyone has cable....... BUT for a family that never believed in having cable, this is like a luxury acquirement. The basement is also furnished now so I've been basically living in the basement since I came home from downtown. Also spent half the break slumbering at other people's places so in all honesty... I haven't really been at home at all... Almost killed my mom on Christmas eve, THAT was REALLY scary. Got some very nice presents, but the cherry on top is definitely mommy's new investment! aka, I'm moving out and living on my own starting May! A lotta pot, of course :D Rather enjoyed my NYE even though it was totally random going to Niagra Falls with two guys I didn't even know... and then drunkenly sucking face with one of them. fun. Chilling with a lot of people whom I haven't seen in a long time. Mattress slides with the girls is so much fun when you're high! Still didn't get my G2.
Overall it was a great holiday and we all know the new year brings forward many great new things! My two-decade celebration is creeping up soon so if anyone's in town around Feb. 9th, keep in touch and I'll let you know the plans *woot woot* So good luck with school/whatever else you may be up to, and don't forget: toke hard! | | |
| Just went through me subscriptions and seems like people are doing their annual updates, har har. Now I'm inspired to update y'all (whom I never see) on my sad state of life. Well, to start, it's nice living back in downtown again... especially if you're living in a friggen paradise of a house. Good roomies, good food, good cat, and overall a good time. School is catching up and the In box is on overload with upcoming assignments and tests I haven't even bothered looking at yet. To prove my point: had to stay up 'til 4am last night writing up an explication on the difference between state of nature and state of war. Didn't even make it to class this morning to hand it in so yea... I'm screwed. But don't get me wrong... I don't regret switching out of Commerce at all. My brain is finally being challenged with shit that Comm was never able to do. Sure I have no idea what I'm doing but hey... it beats learning COGS and diminishing marginal product. *brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr* Aside from school, really haven't done much since school started because I'm stressed out thinking about my future and not knowing (still) what I wanna do with my life. Not much of a social life either but it's not like I don't have friends. No more wild nights out clubbing and have (kinda...?) cut down on the consumption of MJ. No love life either, so let's not even go there. God, this is a shiteous post. No real exciting "anything" to talk about so Imma just leave it as is and lavish some attention on the Marx-Engels reader. | | |
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